I feel like I'm moving in fucking slow motion today. I just can't get my shit together. Jesus.
Anyways I don't know why I make plans. I never do what I say I'm going to do. Oh yeah I'm "for sure" going to be on the lake this weekend. Riiiight. Except no. I am actually going to the Renaissance Festival tomorrow. I have too much shit to do like homework and meetings with realtors to spend two days getting drunk and sunning myself. FML Whatever, being responsible fucking sucks. It's all good I would rather go shopping anyways.
Last night my co-workers and I attempted the saltine cracker challenge. Simple really. 6 crackers in under a minute. Fucking impossible! I had 15 seconds left and one more saltine and Jessi tells me "Just put it in your mouth!" Do you even know how hard it is to say "That's what he said!" with a mouth full of cracker?! I should have recorded it on my cell phone. Maybe I will start vlogging.
One last thing before I spend the next 4 days playing WoW. I want to explain some driving rules just in case you missed the memo. If your lane merges into mine... I have the right of way. If I am smoking and on my cell phone then please for the love of all things good in this world give me the right of way. You don't want to die do you?
I don't have pet peeves; I have whole kennels of irritation.
Okay I'm out. I need to get a mani/pedi because I'll be goddamned if I wear open toes shoes tomorrow with this shabby ass paint job on my toes. Time to make myself pretty. Later bitches!
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